Sunday Short Reviews

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Every Sunday, Gill delves into his archive of over 800 movie reviews and randomly selects three for your enjoyment! Here are this week’s…

Transformers: Dark of the Moon
Just as bloated, loud, noisy and juvenile as the two films that preceded it, Transformers: Dark of the Moon still manages to entertain by providing heaping loads of awesome special effects to oggle, and since the special effects are the only reason I enjoy the Transformers franchise, I definitely got what I wanted out of this movie. Much like a Tony Jaa film, I don’t feel like it’s fair to judge Transformers on anything other than its action scenes, so this one’s getting two ratings – one for the movie and one for the effects. If you were to take out the big fighting robots, this would be one of the dumbest movies of the year, hands down.
Special effects: 5 out of 5
Movie: 2 out of 5

X3: The Last Stand
Considering how bad the third film in any given superhero movie franchise usually is (consider Spider-Man 3, Batman Forever and Superman 3), X3: The Last Stand could definitely have been worse. While the movie is nothing to write home about, and pales in comparison to the badass X2: X-Men United, the cast has managed to retain all of its central members (the lack of Alan Cumming is a disappointment) and since Ian McKellan and Patrick Stewart are still in it, the movie does have some dignity to it. More so than most Brett Ratner films, anyway. It’s not the most satisfying conclusion to the X-Men trilogy, but it at least gives some closure to everyones’ storylines and is fun enough to not be offensive.
3 out of 5

The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor
This lackluster attempt at recapturing the adventurous fun of the first Mummy movie just doesn’t feel like it’s trying. Stephen Sommers isn’t anywhere to be seen, and since Rachel Weisz isn’t either, it’s pretty clear from the outset that everyone involved in this film is just trying to make a buck off a familiar franchise. Even Michelle Yeoh and Jet Li don’t give particularly noteworthy performaces, and the whole movie just feels like it’s going through the motions without any enthusiasm from its cast. There’s a moment near the beginning of the movie where Maria Bello is introduced as the new Evey O’Connell. She turns around and says “I can honestly say she [Evey] is a completely different person.” This tells you basically everything you need to know about this film.
2 out of 5

See you next Sunday for three more thrilling short reviews!

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